datestampFriday, December 23, 2016


Life has had a lot of ups and downs the last few months. I had an experience which kind of led to a snowball effect of several incidents that rocked my world. Looking back, and after thinking about it for quite a long time. I let them rock my world, heart and my mindset. Sometimes the things that people you love say, or do things that cut so deeply that it is hard to see the light...when really it was there the whole time. I just wasn't able to find it. I found myself at a crossroads that I felt I had been at before...almost in another lifetime, but I chose to go left, instead of right. My choice to let it hurt me was devastating for my soul, and I felt alone for the first time in a long time.
The things that we experience either make or break us. I believe that there is balance in all things. Sometimes you have to go through the bitter, to know the sweet, and to appreciate the good things. I did not realize that the way I was handling it was affecting my little family...until one evening not to long ago I was talking to my baby girl. She was talking about Papa and how much she missed him...and how it was hard to understand why he died, and why he was gone from this earth. We got to talking and I found myself giving her advice that I myself needed to hear, and I finally listened. I told her that Life was hard, but God has given us so many good things to make Life a little easier. Like a new day, and the sun rising, the sun setting and the light we enjoy over the mountains. A thoughtful person who says hello, or gives a smile. It's our job to find the good amidst the difficult things that we encounter on our journey...because Life isn't easy, so God makes up for it in all of the little things, to help us along the way. It is our job, to find the good, and to be the good. That night, It was like a light bulb went off in my head and heart...yes, that is what I needed to do as well! I knelt before my God and asked for His let go, to forgive, to be forgiven, to live better, to find the good. I found myself at the crossroads again, and I am choosing to find the light.